Naked Eyes Part 2: Flying with The Green Lantern

In brightest day, in blackest night / No evil shall escape my sight / Let all who worship evil’s might / Beware my power, Green Lantern’s light! - Hal Jordan, The Green Lantern

If you've had a chance to read my previous column, you might remember that I had finally taken the plunge and booked myself in for a LASIK surgery consultation. The moment I opted for ‘laser eyes’, I decided to go deaf as well to the loud, noisy voices inside me and the outside world insisting, “Are you crazy?” “You’ll go blind” or “That’s the scariest thing ever!”

That’s not to say though that I was completely immune to that big fat yellow energy called fear. I am aware of possible surgical complications hanging like a mean cloud over my head. I guess it was just fortunate that the movie Green Lantern was showing in the cinemas at the time and if ever there’s one message it pounded through my reality, it’s this: that we all have the ability to be fearless or to overcome fear! Well, let’s just see about that.

After much research on the LASIK centers available in Cebu, I decided to stick to Centre for Sight at Cebu Doctor’s Hospital. One, they have the latest and most advanced LASIK equipment available: the ALLEGRETTO WAVE® Eye-Q laser system. Two, Centre for Sight has been at the forefront of Refractive Surgery, giving people the chance to see again at 20/20 vision since 2002. Three, the eye surgeon Dr. Yong Larrazabal is a pioneer in Lasik surgery and was recommended by my equally amazing current eye doctor, Dr. Patricia Cinco-Calderon. Besides, he heads the team that has reportedly performed the most number of Lasik procedures outside Metro Manila, so he must know what he's doing, right? But being a communications practitioner, what really clinched it for me was that Centre for Sight provides the most well-informed website about LASIK surgery. For me, anyone who anticipates my questions and provides me with answers before I could ask them must be true to their service.

So there I went to my eye-screening evaluation on a Monday. It’s almost like an audition. The doctor will have to test your eyes’ talents to see if they could be cast into the operating theater. First stop, the refraction test room. The lovely optometrist, Dr. G Manalo gently gave directions and let my eyes perform the dance: blink, read and read (I must have read a hundred letters!), close, open, open wide, dilate, blink, blink, blink. More tests followed in Dr. Yong’s office. Cornea’s thick enough. No cataract or glaucoma. Voila! I was qualified. Good job, eyes.

During the pre-screening, I only had one pressing question: “Doctor, is it possible I’ll go blind?” Please, please cute doctor, just lie to me if it’s true. But Dr. Yong just sat there and calmly said, “Well, we don’t rule out that possibility” Gulp. “But since we introduced Lasik in 2002, we’ve performed about 8,000 operations already and so far, we’ve had zero case for blindness.” That’s something then.

After being told I was a good candidate for LASIK surgery, I decided right then to schedule the procedure that same week. They operate only once a week -- on a Wednesday-- which as the fates would have it, was also my birthday. Never mind. I figured two days was more than enough time to prepare for it without giving myself too much time to freak out and change my mind.

Wednesday came soon enough and to my surprise, there were eight of us scheduled for operation that afternoon. Each of us were given a Valium – to calm us or help us sleep right after the ‘nightmare’ (don’t mind if I take two!) Sadly I think I was so cracked out on coffee that the Valium barely worked. Then we were led to the waiting room for pre-op sanitation. There was lots of humor to be found amongst the other patients which helped me relax. It probably had something to do with the cute head bonnets and little booties we all had to wear. Or it could be that we were all just so giddily scared, it was funny. Or maybe it was the blurry image of Beyonce on the video screen on the wall, shaking that beautiful ass while we waited for our turn.

A few minutes later, I was led to the operating room. I saw the eye savior machine: the 30 million peso investment Allegretto Wave Eye-Q Laser system supposed to weave magic on half-blind creatures like me. Oh well, this is it, heaven help me. Bring it on, dear Allegretto!

As soon as I lay down, I could hear Dr. Yong’s cheerful voice, “Look towards the green light.” My naked eyes looked up. There it was: green- the color of will. At that moment I knew I was going to be all right. The good Lord has graciously sent me The Green Lantern, after all.

The experience was almost surreal. It’s like being transported in a machine to the universe. To distract myself, I replayed the fight scene between the Green Lantern and the evil yellow-hued fear-catcher Parallax. I was so engrossed by the movie in my mind I almost did not to notice what they’re doing to my pretty eyes. Almost, but not quite, as I’m too much of a curious writer not to record everything.

Like how they numbed my eyes with drops, put a patch over my left eye first, so it wouldn't see what’s happening to the right eye and run away. They taped my right eyelids back and then put some little spring like device in there to hold it open. This part might look freaky in the videos, but surprisingly it’s not really painful at all. The next part though was a bit uncomfortable. Something like a suction device was attached to my eyeball, creating some pressure, while they create a flap. Lovely. I swallowed my fear, cleared my mind and imagined flying higher with the Green Lantern. Then everything went dark.

From afar I could hear the buzzing sound of the laser machine being fired up, smelled something like burnt hair. Then came the unearthly voice of the doctor’s assistant counting ... 50% ... 70%... oh gosh, are we there yet?... 80%...focus… 90%... 100%.... The machine finally stopped churning. Suddenly I could see red dots, like the enemy’s insides exploding. It was kinda pretty. They replaced the flap, gave it a lot of eye drops, and smoothed it all into place. The whole episode couldn’t have been more than 5 minutes. I could see the Green Lantern once more. In a godlike voice, Dr. Yong said, “Congratulations, operation went well.”

But just before you could feel like you just survived landing on the moon and are on your way back home to earth, you realize that you have one eye left to go. “Proceeding to the other eye. Ready.”

Groan. Look to the green light. Oh there you are! I relaxed a bit. The Green Lantern and I flew once more to the Universe, fought the enemy and waited in the dark for the portal’s countdown… 80% … 90%... 100%. Then, that cheerful voice again, “Operation is successful. Congratulations, birthday girl.”

When I opened my eyes, I could already see but everything was hazy, with halos surrounding objects. Have I died and gone to heaven then? The doctor’s angel hurriedly assured that’s normal and then led me back to earth, I mean, the waiting room, where the lovely Dr. Manalo applied drops of antibiotics and anti-inflammatory meds in each eye (no pain here!). She removed my cap and booties, gave me my detailed eye safety instructions and then some super fly protective sunglasses like Cyclop’s and I was done. I was told to go home and sleep it off for a few hours.

The morning after, I woke up. Oh hello, world! I couldn’t stop grinning. Beyond my window, I see the brightest day. I did it! Not only did I win 20/20 vision from yesterday’s battle, I overcame fear and found my courage as well. I soared with joy. The Green Lantern not far behind.

-- SunStar Weekend, July 30, 2011